I don’t know why I did it. Usually I fall all over myself in my rush to announce that Sophie has Down syndrome. But even though I’ve yet to really toss myself in the deep end when it comes to finding her a junior high option, I’m already feeling myself drowning.

Yesterday I found myself home from vacation and without any more good excuses for putting this off. So I looked up the first school on my list — ASU Prep, a charter school in downtown Phoenix — and fired off an email to the director:

Mr. Lebowitz — My daughter Sophie is entering 5th grade…and my husband and I are looking for middle school options. I’d love to learn more about your middle school program in Phoenix — could I get a tour?

Thanks in advance!

Amy Silverman

I had a personal response by last night:

Hi Amy.  Thanks for contacting me, and I am glad you are interested in ASU
Prep.  We are very proud of our school and our students, and we would be happy to give you a tour and tell you about our school.  We are preparing now for the new school year and our students start back on July 31.  I would give us a couple of weeks after that before we schedule a tour of the school so you can see real kids and teachers in their classrooms.  We also will be having prospective student/family orientations starting in October. Those will be advertised on our website.

Let me know what works for you.  I have included our academic counselor, Ms. Moreno, on this e-mail as she will help coordinate your tour.  I look forward to meeting you and your daughter.

Of course, Sophie is Greek for wisdom, so ASU Prep would be the perfect place for her.

Art Lebowitz
Director of Secondary Learning
ASU Preparatory Academy, Phoenix

Oh fuck, I thought as I read that lovely note. This is really awkward. Do I immediately reply and say, “Well, um, actually, there’s something I forgot to mention?” Do I go ahead and schedule the tour, and not say anything — yet? Do I move onto my next option?

For such a pushy person, I’m just not very good at how hard to push when it comes to Sophie. Or, in this case, where to push.

By the way, I already knew Sophie was Greek for wisdom. I knew it when we named her, which was before she was born, before we “knew,” if you know what I mean. I have a vague memory of saying to someone (Ray? my mom?) at the time of her diagnosis, “Maybe we should consider a different name, since, you know….”

There was a general wincing at the fact that I’d even mention such a thing, and Sophie stuck. Last night, I read the prep school director’s email, then looked up the word “wisdom” in the dictionary. From Merriam-Webster:

wis·dom noun \ˈwiz-dəm\
a : accumulated philosophic or scientific learning
b : ability to discern inner qualities and relationships
c : good sense

I’m not sure about a and c, but Sophie’s definitely got b going on — in spades. Still, I’m not sure that’s what Mr. Lebowitz meant. I think I need to keep looking.