Turns out, yesterday’s kidney stone episode was not to end so quickly. He needs two operations; the first will be Monday.

I am not at liberty to share details (to the contrary, I was warned, “Don’t you dare laugh about this with your friends”) but let’s just say that I feel very, very sorry for my husband.

And I am on my way this weekend to Whole Foods to purchase any and all products that promise to keep me from ever getting kidney stones. Up til now, Ray’s scoffed at natural remedies for anything and everything, but somehow I have a feeling he’s seen the light. So I’ll be sure to get enough for him, too. (Though nothing will save him from surgery at this point.)

Last night, in an effort to calm a weepy Annabelle (she didn’t like the sound of “kidney stones” and I can’t say I blame her) I Googled “How to tell your kid about kidney stones” and instead learned that kidney stones are now common among children.

SUPER.  I didn’t share that part. Of course, I’d just gotten done swearing to her that this only happens to “old people”.

Then I Googled “graphic” and “kidney stones,” in an effort to find an illustration to show her. Instead, I learned that the treatment for kidney stones in the 1800s was not a pleasant one. Also that it’s suspected that global warming is responsible for an increase in kidney stones today. (Even that one got Ray to smile.)

Finally, I sat down next to Annabelle and tried to simply explain what a kidney stone is. After several failed attempts, I finally said, “OK, imagine you were really constipated and you pooped and it came out of your ‘nina’.”

Her eyes got big and she immediately went to work on a get well card for Daddy.

All I can say is ouch.