“If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe.” — Carl Sagan

We got busy with the fondant over the weekend. And the fondant smoother and the lazy susan that lets you turn the cake as you ice it with the special spatula so it looks perfect, like on “Cake Boss.”

What a pain in the ass. And what fun. Annabelle’s fast approaching that age where she just can’t be bothered with much of anything. But here, on the cusp of her 10th birthday, we spent a joyful night spreading and sculpting and decorating a heck of a cake. 

A cake, I might add, made from a box mix, iced with boxed frosting. (And, if you’re really into these things, you must know it was covered in canned fondant, not homemade.)

Last year on her birthday, Annabelle told me in no uncertain terms I was to make her cake from scratch. I stressed but managed to produce a pretty good chocolate sour cream number, thanks to Heather. This year she said it was okay if I took the short cut; I did make a special trip to Trader Joe’s for the better mix, this was no Betty Crocker affair. (OK, come to think of it, the frosting was BC.)

Driving home from an extra trip to the grocery store for something or other, wondering if maybe I should turn around and go back for the long list of “from scratch” ingredients, I caught the tail end of one of my favorite NPR shows, “The Splendid Table,” just in time to hear the quote above. I’d never heard it before. But it will become my mantra, I assure you.

Thank you, Carl Sagan. I’m off to stock up on cake mix.

In the end, we didn’t make a cake today, because I realized too late that I had no icing in the house. If you watched “Cake Boss” on TLC (or “Ace of Cakes” on the Food Network — cakes are apparently “in”), you would know that you need to “dirty ice” your cake with buttercream before laying the fondant over it. Annabelle didn’t want to go back to Safeway, so instead she practiced cutting shapes with some leftover fondant from the other night.

The other night, she and I whipped up our first (but clearly not last) fondant cake, in honor of my father in law’s 70th birthday.

I approached this endeavor the way I approach most things I haven’t done before: with great fear.

But the fondant was so easy (I highly recommend buying the top-of-the-line fondant — it’ll be a dollar more per container, well worth it according to the woman at the baking supply store — ours is ABC Cake Supplies in Phoenix) I tackled another never-attempted project this weekend: assembling a small cardboard storage box from IKEA.

OK, you’ve got to start somewhere. And for me, it was with a large amount of bright green fondant. Don’t forget the cornstarch and a good rolling pin. Annabelle was absolutely thrilled; we have firm plans for the next cake, which will happen when we are no longer sick. Even Ray — who has been known at times to scoff at my craft projects — admitted it was pretty cool, and requested a New York coffee cake. Sans the fondant.

The best part: My father in law actually liked it! At least he said so, and both girls beamed. (Sophie actually fell asleep before the cake cooled enough to decorate, but she was in on the planning.) Now, I’m not sure I saw my father in law take a bite of cake, but to be honest, neither did I. Under the fondant, Betty Crocker was just a little too involved for my taste. Have you ever smelled her “buttercream” icing? Gross.

But hey, this is art. As for me, I’m going to keep working on my “Never Done Before, To Do” list.

Note: I had every intention of successfully posting a photo of the girls and their grandpa and the cake — but let’s just say my trip to the Genius Bar at the Apple store didn’t leave me a genius. Tomorrow, I promise. And on my “Never Done Before, To Do” list: master computer.

She, Sophie and I all caught colds (a record — school’s barely been back two weeks) and while Sophie and I are fully functional though snuffly, as often happens, Annabelle’s went straight to her chest and she was up at 3:30 this morning, coughing that terrifying croup-y cough. I don’t think it’s technically croup, but close enough. She and I stayed home.

I dragged her to Safeway for milk, then put her in front of the TV and made her favorite egg and rice dish; there are artichokes steaming right now, another favorite. I was really proud that I remembered to cancel my lunch appointment, only to remember that I forgot I’d double booked when the phone rang at 11:45. Damnit.

The edges of my facade are peeling up — more than usual. I’m off to the Genius Bar at the Apple store when Ray gets home tonight (that’s why I haven’t posted any photos lately; my IT problems have snowballed) and I’m schizo in that way I always am when I work at home: I have plenty of real work to do, but the house is a sty and I know I’ll be so much more productive on the computer as soon as I reorganize the VHS tapes. (I actually just did that; it only made me want to tackle the DVDs.)

As is so often the case, Annabelle’s the one who cut through the cobwebs, reminding me of what I should really be doing.

Pretending to eat her rice, she mentioned — out of nowhere — that when she’s on Project Runway (not if but when) she’ll be sure to do it before she has kids, since otherwise they’ll miss her while she’s gone.

And then a few minutes later, she asked if we could please please please bake. And use the fondant. I paused to consider it. If we do that, there goes any hope of any more cleaning or working — and it’ll make a giant mess. We’ll waste the last of the fondant I made her promise we’d save for a special occasion.

It was a no brainer.

“Yes,” I said. “We can.”

Along with all sorts of other childish delights, Smeeks — the cool new candy store in central Phoenix — features a photo booth. The girls and I took advantage Saturday. (We’ll have to go back and figure out where the camera lens is. Whoops.)

We also shopped for fondant (turns out you can buy it pre-made — phew!) and later this week we’ll be searching for our inner “Cake Boss”. (If you haven’t seen it on TLC, it’s a must-view — in our house, anyway. Comes on just after “Jon and Kate Plus 8,” which I swear I’m going to stop watching.)

And I spent a great deal of time shoving stuff in Rubbermaid containers and finding places to shove them. We swam, Annabelle had a playdate, Ray took the girls to Chuck E. Cheese while I saw “Julie and Julia”.  Busy, busy.

It won’t surprise you, then, to learn that at, oh, I’d say approximately 8:10 this morning (about 20 minutes before we absolutely-positively-otherwise-we’ll-get-late-slips have to get out the door) Annabelle announced, in a panic, that she had not done her homework.

She praticed piano while I showered then challenged Sophie to put her shoes and socks on before I could get dressed (she won!), then remarkably, Annabelle made it through all 9 letters of her name, decorating each on a page provided by the teacher. Phew.

We didn’t get the 20 minutes of reading homework in, but tomorrow’s another day.